Biblical Wisdom
Whoever Speaks Second
The first half of Proverbs 15:1 is about an answer, which means somebody else has already raised their voice.
Scripture Proverbs 15:1
“A gentle answer turns away wrath, but a harsh word stirs up anger.”
Start with the noun. An answer comes second. Somebody else has already spoken, and the wrath in this proverb is theirs. Gentleness is easy with gentle people. Proverbs asks for it at the moment the other person has given you every reason to drop it.
Then look at the second half, which quietly changes the noun. It speaks of a harsh word, and a word needs nothing to reply to. It can start a fight by itself, or restart one that was about to die down.
You did not choose the tone of the first sentence. The tone of the next one is yours, and in most kitchens and meetings that is the sentence that decides how the evening ends.
The proverb makes no promise that the other person will be reasonable. It only tells you which way your answer pushes.
Scripture in English is from the Berean Standard Bible, placed in the public domain by its publisher on 30 April 2023.